Monday, August 29, 2011

SELAMAT HARI RAYA



Selamat hari raya 2 all my readers
Maaf zahir dan batin

Pls drive safely on this holiday season

Saturday, August 27, 2011

New chapter



Am supposed to write a long post but somehow, I don't feel like it..anyway,the vid above & below shows my feelings better,much better than what I can explain with words





Tell me sumting what do you do when the things u do never seems to be right?


Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Something ain't rite



Its alredi a week L said that he loves me but somehow, I don't feel it... am I playing with his heart? I mean he has everything that I want so what more do I want what?

Someone,just shoot me


Sunday, August 21, 2011

Right choice


15 yrs ago

Mom: study hard so that u can be a Doc

Dad: stop playing and go and read book..be a Doc

10 yrs ago

Mom: Don't go out till late night,u will have no energy to study 2morrow.. I want u 2 be a doc

Dad: Be a Doc..Be a Doc..Be a Doc

Teacher: Become a Doctor,u can do that,ur one of the HARAPAN SEKOLAH

9 yrs ago

Me: I wanna stop study for a while,settle my Ns 1st

Dad: No, go and study. I want u 2 be a doc

Teacher: why,why... go and apply for matrix.. Ur a good student,go and be a doctor..later can do
Ns

Mom: Ur no son of mine..crazy kid,why wanna do Ns so fast..

7 yrs ago

Me: I wanna go 2 do Business

Dad: why,no hope

Mum: Faints

1 yr ago

Dad: u want to do Doc after this,follow ur sister lah,do medicine

Mum: yeah,later ur salary big.. not like the course that ur taking now,long hours,little pay..
play with urine,blood and all,dirty job


Present

Sis: H.O will only get rm 2000+ and need to work shifts. I need to compete with 2000+ medical
students.. siao de

Mum: U know,our neighbour said ur job is good,become S.O or R.O is high pay..no need to be
Doc,senang kena sue.. u take MSc,then Phd,go work in Uni or Research center.. work
Govt. senang dpt elaun

Dad: Lucky ur loan is small,faster settle it,don't be like that Doc in that clinic,2o years still
haven't settle, later,if u want I can pay for u

Me: NOW U SEE WHAT I SAW 15 YEARS AGO... *shrugs and continue playing games*

Ps: I'm not against ppl who are doing MBBS if they are being passionate about it but if ur forced to be one or ur in for the money,pls remember that its ur life,ur given one life,there is no reset button. Take a year or 2 off, to think about what u want to do..
U have one chance to live ur life.



Friday, August 19, 2011

New Love


L: Hey, I think I'm in love with u

I: Ur sure,we only have been seeing each other for a mth je

L: Yeah but we have been chatting with each other longer than that

I: U don't know me yet fully so I think that its premature lah

L: Scared?

I: Nope,being realistic.. who knows what u have in ur closet. Besides that,starting next mth, I'll not be in shah alam as frequent.. U can tahan anot?

L: lolz, U need it more than I do

I: Go and find someone better than me...


After an hour

I: U really love me?

L: huh?

I: Why do u want me? Byk lagi,students yg cute and comel kat uni tu

L: *********************************************************


Thursday, August 18, 2011

Tai Tian Zhen


Everything has certain limit,once u reach that limit,u'll care less and move away to find other stuff to do.

I know that I have zero patience on waiting especially when I need to deal with ppl on things like doing teamwork stuff and going on an outing and etc.

Therefore, when I keep trying to preserve a relationship and the other party doesn't, makes me super sien,then knowing that the person has time for others makes one feel insignificant. Sumtimes, am wondering why this matter keeps repeating itself.

Maybe I'm still naive,trusting that the world is still full of nice ppl,anyway,the world still rotates and my life still goes on......

Monday, August 15, 2011

Thursday, August 11, 2011



My heart's a stereo
It beats for your, so listen close
Hear my thoughts in every note

Make me your radio
Turn me up when you feel low

This melody was meant for you
Just sing along to my stereo



If I was just another dusty record on the shelve
Will you blow me off and play me like everybody else

If I ask you to scratch my back, could you manage that
Like it read well, check it Travie, I can handle that
Furthermore, I apologize for any skipping tracks
This the last girl that play me left a couple cracks
I used to used to used to used to, now I’m over that
Cause holding grudges over love is ancient artifacts


If I could only find a note to make you understand
I sing a song and the image grab me by the hands
Keep myself inside your head, like your favorite tune
And know my heart is a stereo that only plays for you


My heart's a stereo
It beats for your, so listen close
Hear my thoughts in every note

Make me your radio
Turn me up when you feel low
This melody was meant for you
Just sing along to my stereo

Oh oh oh oh To my stereo
Oh oh oh oh So sing along to my stereo



If I wasn't old school, fifty pound boombox
Would you hold me on your shoulder, wherever you walk
Would you turn my volume up before of the cops
And crank it higher everytime they told you to stop
And all I ask is that you don't get mad at me
When you have to purchase mad D batteries
Appreciate every mixtape your friends make
You never know we come and go like we're on the interstate


I think I finally found a note to make you understand
If you can hear it, sing along and take me by the hands
Keep myself inside your head, like your favorite tune

And know my heart is a stereo that only plays for you

[Chorus]

My heart's a stereo
It beats for your, so listen close
Hear my thoughts in every note

Make me your radio
Turn me up when you feel low
This melody was meant for you
Just sing along to my stereo


Oh oh oh oh To my stereo
Oh oh oh oh So sing along to my stereo

[Bridge]

I only pray you never leave me behind
Because good music can be so hard to find
I take your hand and pull it closer to mine

Thought love was dead, but now you're changing my mind

[Chorus]

My heart's a stereo
It beats for your, so listen close
Hear my thoughts in every note

Make me your radio
Turn me up when you feel low
This melody was meant for you
Just sing along to my stereo

Oh oh oh oh To my stereo
Oh oh oh oh So sing along to my stereo

Monday, August 8, 2011

Role models


I'm sure that everyone has one or more ppl that they look up to 2 for inspiration, wishing one day that they are will be like that someday.

I remember that when I was in Form 3,when the school organised its annual motivational camp, a teacher asked my group who is our role models,most stated that they want to be like The Prophet or Gandhi or Einstein,my reply was I wanted to be like one of my teacher,Pn S. The teacher was shocked at my reply and demanded an explanation.

My reply was," WHY SHOULD WE AIM FOR THE IMPOSSIBLE, I WANT TO BE REALISTIC AND BE ON PAR OR BETTER THAN MY ROLE MODEL,THEN I HAVE NO EXCUSES TO NOT BE A BETTER PERSON."

Yeah,I know I'm a bit ambitious in my aims but seriously, what is the use of having role models when ur just following someone's lead,why not take the good qualities of each of ur role model and blend it to ur taste?

I know that I have a long way to go before proclaiming that I'm the king of world but the very least I want to achieve success on my terms not by simply mimicking others.

Uni has taught me many things,some are good and some are bad but like Mao said,"It doesn't matter whether the cat is white or black,as long as it catches the mice. Don't get me wrong, I would not be as evil as that,but I want to show ppl that u can achieve ur dreams without sacrificing things that are dear to u,for instance my principles and my frens.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Alone tonite



The whole day I was finishing up my report for work,when I got a call from from the Lecturer(read my previous posts,then u know). So Ichi being Itchy naturally would not refuse such an offer,besides he is quite the cutey and has good hands.......

Anyway, after doing it, I left his place and met a fren for supper,when he asked whether I have given up on love.. Naturally, I said No but after thinking hard in solitude, I wonder if my answer is the truth..

Sure,my future bf will be appalled at what I have done before seeing him but to not have sex with others unless he is ur bf is kinda not my style. Just tell me how sure are u of ur lover will be there for u forever? Making assumptions on sumting not concrete is kinda dumb...
I wonder if there would be a person who would love both of my facades; the Light and the Dark sides of me..

Sori2,back to the topic, looking for superficial love/pleasure during ONS is just like taking in drugs, the danger,the trill,the adrenaline rush,the climaxes is nice, for few hours, u feel like ur a part of someone,a few hours,u feel that he loved u but when reality sets in,ur just a lonely soul.. Maybe,I'm just doing ONS to get rid of my loneliness

In a perfect world,ppl like me do not exist.. Lestat once said; if I'm bad,then teach me how to be good, if I'm good,then teach me so that I could be good in being good.

Both the devil and the angel exist in me, can someone destroy the darkness in me?



Saturday, August 6, 2011

Last Month of intern:Office politics



Imagine that ur in a dept with 5 heads, 6 deputies, 20 assistants, 30 junior assistants...and ur just a vermin,a piece of dirt, a lowly intern whose main job is to suck knowledge from all 61 members of d dept that ur assigned to by the HR. Ur mission is to survive 4 5 mths and report back to the HQ when ur tenure is over...

How boleh survive ke x?

After a few mths, u discover that all 5 heads have their own agenda and not all are frens,the rest are after ur ass cos ur a raw jewel that can be shaped by their ideologies, each group wants u to their comrade in arms,each wants to ur untainted blood to bleed for ideology,their manifesto. All are watching u to make d smallest blunder so that they can be delighted in letting u be a part of the other group;their loss will not be another's gain.

U in the other hand want to preserve ur own way,ur right of being,ur principles from being poison,in othe words, u want to be u, u seek neutrality with others,projecting ur own shine without dimming the others. U move carefully,preserving ur ties with everyone without hurting the rest.

An impossible mission? After all that u went thru, nothing is impossible anymore

narang gyulhonhae joolae



will you marry me
do you want to live together forever
we can sweetly love each other,
have a baby that looks like me, a baby that looks like you,
not be sick forever.. i want to live like that

honestly, i love you more
in a relationship between man and woman
they say it's better like that

i'll love you more
i'll care for you more
when tears fall and it's hard
when it hurts, we'll hurt together
i'll love you forever
i'll protect you forever
i'm thankful that i met someone as great as you
i want to love only you everyday

will you marry me

[rap] everyday, i feel so happy that
for no reason, i look forward to the next day
why why am i trembling so much
no matter how i think of it, you're my number one person
until our black hair turns white as snow
until our lives end
even if you suffer physically, i won't ever make you suffer emotionally

you're the other half of my heart
i'll become the other half of your heart
every moment that you breathe
i'll love you
even as time passes and our wrinkles grow
you and me, we'll be together forever like now

i'll love you more
i'll care for you more
when tears fall and it's hard
when it hurts, we'll hurt together
i'll love you forever
i'll protect you forever
i'm thankful that i met someone as great as you
i want to love only you everyday

you're like a light that brightened up my dark life
a house that welcomes me with the sound of stew boiling
a rain that watered my dry heart
a seed that contains the real fruit of love
a string of fate that the heavens decided
our meeting was destined by the heavens
i wouldn't trade you for the world
in my life, there's only you, forever

i'll love you more
i'll care for you more
when tears fall and it's hard
when it hurts, we'll hurt together
i'll love you forever
i'll protect you forever
i'm thankful that i met someone as great as you
i want to love only you everyday

will you marry me

Wednesday, August 3, 2011