Sunday, March 29, 2009

Cold war

Sigh,sometimes I envy ppl like yannick,willy and the ones that are staying alone. I know most don't have it easy but sometimes its so worth it,staying alone without parents especially those who can't understand you and keep on wanting to control you like a puppet.

Is being a puppet means that ur being filial?I'm really at crossroad rite now,shuld I sacrifice my dreams to keep my sanity?

Each day,He makes my life harder by doing the simple things like ignoring my being or forcing me to choose between his way or the highway.

Maybe one day,I might break down and .........................

To the fathers out there, just be fair with ur children, don't treat them unequally in all aspects. You want respect but how can u ask for something that you won't give.

To my readers,i need some input on how to solve this problems. I have 2 options rite now,stay with the family till I graduate or get a part time,save up and stay away from the family?

Friday, March 27, 2009

My hobby

Everyone has a hobby to fill up their free time. My hobby or I shuld hobbies are boy-watching,porn and my most favourite hobby is playing games especially strategy games like
RED ALERT or COMMAND and CONQUER.

This two games are super cool and I get a rush especially when I battle it out with other players.

Background of the games

RED ALERT

I'm going to talk about Red Alert 1 and 2(haven't played the 3rd one cos my com doesn't support it). It is set in an alternate universe during the WWW 2.The factions invovled is America and Soviet. Why soviets not germans? Its cos Einstein developed a time machine and went back in time and killed Hitler. So the Soviet started the WW2 instead. Thats the storyline in RED ALERT 1.

In the RED ALERT 2,the soviets under the new premier who was appointed by the ALLIES ordered an attack on the USA. As the story progresses,we found out that the soviet premier was brain controlled by his advisor,YURI.

COMMAND AND CONQUER

The world is controlled by 2 factions the Brotherhood of NOD (NOD) and the UN Global Defences Intiative (GDI). They fight for tiberium which is a kinda of enegery mineral which is from outer space.

So how good am I in playing these games?

Some of u may notice that some of the commentors call me as Ivan not Ichi. The name "Ivan" was given by my gamer friends cos I always use the Soviets to play the games and I also use the Soviet Doctrine which is hit hard. One of the Soviets' strategy is to attack with a lot of tanks and they also believed in "the best defense is the best offense".

But nowadays,its a bit hard to win when I play with the yound bloods cos it seems that they dedicated a lot of time to play and they have a lot of good tactics like keep hitting the harvesters or keep hitting the bases for examples.

Maybe its time for the Sifus and Masters to retire? nah,gaming is what I'm good at.I'll keep on playing it and teaching the newbies about the game.

ARE U UP FOR A CHALLENGE?





Thursday, March 26, 2009

At last,a review

Finally,I have time to do reviews. This is LILY ALLEN's time to shine. I sure some of you had heard this gal on youtube or on myspace.

Lily Allen 1st debutted on myspace in Nov 2005 and up to date she has 2 albums which are Alright,still and Its no you,its me.

Her lyrics are catching and casual but its lovely,maybe I'm being biased cos the american singers suck right now.

Enuff said,I posted 3 music videos of her,U be the judge,k?


FUCK U




FAG HAG





SMILE



Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Baby,ur mine forever

Today is our annivesary,my Hime. A year has passed and we're still together. My sweetest Hime,U always keep me company while I'm alone. You have always been there with me,braving the elements together. You always provide me with shelter no matter how hot or cold the environment is.

My Hime, although sometimes I forgot to pamper you or to keep u happy,u always make me happy and satifiesed. Many ppl had came between us but you still stayed with me.

My darling Hime, could you forgive me for all the pain that I had caused. Please forgive me for not providing you with the best treatment .

My sweetest Hime, please be with me forever,pls be my everlasting companion.

My KuroHime,I'll promise u that I'll make u evem more happier this year,I'll pamper u more and I'll feed you with the best.


The pics of My KuroHime-chan


Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Is this it? Is this truly it?

Over the years,I see many gays make the same mistake that I made,although some learn of the truth,some still wander in the darkness. It seems that most or all gays at some point of their life thought that having a lover is the 1st priority in their life but sadly it seems that having a lover isn't that important at all.

Why do I say this? Well,gays are men and we all know that men aren't the committed lot.That's why u can't see gay couples who are in the hurry to get married,this feature is often shown by our lesbian sisters. Tell me frankly,could yourself raising a family with ur bf? Don't ur eyes often stray when a hunk walked past when your lover is beside u?

Its better to focus your energy to better yourself,get a better job or car or even a house.I realized this when my aunt who is a transvestite started to live alone,away from her bf of 15-20 yrs. The reason was the spark was gone. Both of them parted without the usual fights or misunderstandings.

I'm not saying that gays are not able to love but sometimes lust is misunderstood as love.This phenomena is common among the young and sometimes happened among the old birds.Just because a guy gave you extra special attention,you start to yearn for him. To him,you are just a cock/hole for him to try and when he leaves you,you start to lament that he's the love of ur life.

Again,I'm not saying that gays are just cock hungry,I have seen couples who endure decades together.I am trying to say is you should not focus on love only,there is more to gay life than finding Mr Right.You should spend more time on make urself better or on those loving friends who are always there during your hardest moments or promote for understanding of being gay among the narrow minded breeders.

To the young ones,don't simply say he is Mr Right after a nite of love making,go and experience the ups and downs of gay life and find frens that really wants to help you to be a better person. After all,you need that one person who isn't afraid to burst your dreams and force you to return to reality.Also be happy and merry,try all those kinky and fetishes that gays are known for and pick ur own fetish. Through experiences,you will know what you want in the future and in Mr Right.

And everyone knows that when you trying hard to find love,Cupid seems to be on a holiday but it seems that love will always find u when u least expect it.

PS: Paragraph no 6 isn't for Little Prince.

I know U missed me

Ichi's back,ppl. Its time to celebrate.

Most of u must be asking why is this guy taking a break for? Well, I find that when i focus too much in the virtual world,I kinda lose my sense of being and I tend to absorb other ppl's way of thinking and beliefs,so during my break,I'll take the time to relax,refocus and re- energize my energy and thoughts.

That's the first reason,the 2nd is I feel that sometimes the gay world sucks my energy out, as some of u notice,the gay world have rules to follow and since I'm not the typical gay(I don't have the sense of style,not a cam-whore and play those games that most fags stay away from) so breaks are needed to keep me from going for a visit in Tanjong Rambutan or Woodbridge.

Enuff of my reasons of taking a break. What did I do during my 2 days of bliss?


Sunday

- cleaned my room.
Got rid of those unwanted lecture notes and recompiled them into the files.

- Wash my car,got rid off the fuel receipts.

- reorganized my porn collection :)

- had a girls' nite out. I went out at 11 pm and came back at 5 am. We went to this Mamak restaurant at Cheras,its called Kayu Nasi Kandar,i think. Its near the Tasik Permaisuri. The funny thing is there is an outlet in Subang but no,we need to go to the Cheras outlet.Then, we went around Kl,the usual spots which are BB,LQ and DBKL. Not much gay activities on that nite. The last stop was at Tasik Permaisuri, Al wanted me to get a john but I was too shy and an old fren of Al turned up,those two stuff turned me off and plus the john that I wanted played hard to get,sian.

Monday

- updated my bank accs (I hate doing this cos my balance are always minimal)

- paid my car and my dad's cars' loans.

- went to the post office to renew my license but the clerk said that I need to go to JPJ to change
photo in the license. (postoned it to Tuesday instead).

- Read a book titled "EVITA"

* these activities took me a whole day and I was half awake due the activities of Sunday nite.Starbucks was the only thing that kept me going.

- suppose to meet up with the last friday guy but I was too sleepy to have sexs.

Tuesday

- completed all my tasks from Monday execpt meeting up the guy,he had work to do.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

HIATUS

Elo,everyone.
Ichi will be taking a short break from the blogosphere and the gay world
as he has been avoiding the world of heteros for long time alredi.

Don't fret,k?
This break will be used for other activities of Ichi
and
for Ichi to recharge himself
You could still contact Ichi at his email or Hp or YM
or thru his various profiles.




Saturday, March 21, 2009

My greatest weakness

I'm sure that everyone has a weakness,like some hate the colour green or some always worry about the little things.

For me,I have a great weakness which is:

My possessive nature

From a young age, I had always have experienced disappointments in relationships. Let it be father-son,fren-fren or bf-bf realtionships. At some point,they always leave me alone. The reasons may vary like they move away,no enuff time or got bored with me.

So I tend to create a wall to avoid more pain and if they could penerate the wall and get close to me,I tend to be overbearing or controlling. Sometimes I even think that they don't really care or just be friends for that certain period of time.For an example, I lost contact with my highschool frens execpt for 3 people or my foundation mates, I still kept contact with 2 of them but during my foundatuion period, I had about 20 frens who I'm close with.Its odd that ppl that we had shared our dreams with could just be stranger the next minute.

So I kept building and reinforcing this wall of mine in order to safeguard my sanity and hear.Extriorly,I might be firm and unfriendly but if You pry deeply,I'm totally the opposite.

Recently,there is this guy who manage to shatter my defences and he really got to know me well,if even when I say nothing,he could guess my worries.

Lately,I have been kinda mean to him,trying to push him away,trying not to be attach to him so much but sadly I failed. The reason of why I did that to him is I feel that I'm being pushed away by him, like he spend so little time with me. I know I'm being stupid and he didn't mean that,after all he has his own things to do.

To this wonderful boy, I could only say that I'm sorry and I'm trying to work on this weakness,trying to improve myself.

Mt Ichi finally erupts

Wow,my prayers had been answered ( I have always know that God is gay). Yesterday,I posted about not getting any action below.

Then,around yesterday evening,I got an email from a reader saying that he was to be my fuck buddy ( Someone really kesian me) and we were chatting around. I thought he was a psycho hunting for victims. After a while,I found him to be smart and witty so I decided to meet him up 2day.

The timeline of events:

6.30 am

Woke up and gave a wake up call to Little prince. Then continue snoozing

10.30 am

Woke up and cleaned my room

12.30 pm

Went brunch with him. Wow,he is so cute,cuter than my "ex". He is just 21 yrs old but he is matured and knows what he wants. On the reason of wanting a fuck buddy,he said that he is not ready for commitments and wants to finish his studies and get a stable job.Then he'll look for a life partner. I found him to be interesting and full of knowledge,meaning he doesn't talk on petty issues and I am starting to like him.After exchanging our past and all,he went to settle his stuff and I had to go to Friday prayers.We arranged to meet up later in the afternoon.

2.00 pm

Killed time with Al.Had a heart to heart moment and tried a new coffee shop which is Wak Dol Kopitiam. I love those chairs there,so comfy.

4.30 pm

Went to his house which was at section 2,he shares it with his brother who was outstation. I saw his room,it was amazingly neat and well decorated.We sat on the bed which is a queen sized (almost everyone I know has a queen sized bed,I want one).

We were talking about porn and he agreed that the best porn producer is Bel ami. We watched a few to get in the mood (I'm a shy person,I don't initiated the 1st move). He was like touching2 and we kissed on the lips,strangely he reminds me of someone cos he don't use tongue,just kiss on the lips. Then the fun starts ...........

He pushed me down on the bed and continue his kisses but his hands were moving around,touching everything. Then I changed the position with me being on top. I start to french kiss him (Ichi loves tongue). Then I unbuttoned his shirt bit by bit and started to suck his nipples. Then he pushed me down and start to undress me and started to kiss my cock,he reaaaally gave me a good blow job.

Then he went for the love channel,lubing with saliva and all. After that,he wanted to penetrate but the channel was too narrow and he used Ky to widen it and he started to insert his dick slowing cos it was a monster. When it was fully in,he started to give power thrusts and pound my brains out. Next, he changed position from doggy to chicken,he started to mix slow thrusts and fast thrusts.All of this thrust were hitting my prostate and Mount Ichi erupts without me touching it. He kept on pounding me hard and whispered dirty words into my ear. That turned me off cos I hate dirty talk during sex.

After 1o mins of pounding,his Cum were on my body and it was my turn cos both of us are flexis.
I wouldn't comment on what I did cos my skills were rusty due to lack of holes available.
Its safe to say that Mt Ichi erupted 3 times today.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Not getting any

I'm truly sian(Sian is my most usable word after fuck it). I'm so horny at the moment that I could fuck a hamster.(I'm not an animal lover)

Maybe its karma or a signal from above to stop playing around and randomly find guys at chatrooms or websites but lately my little Ichi isn't getting any exercise and he is bored.The people who I meet for a quickie also don't excite me,their techniques are so lame.My frens said that its karma cos I used to reject invites from people but if they are ugly,you can't expect Little Ichi to be excited rite?

Furthermore,I'm not the type that would wank after watching porn anymore,Its seems that even porn is too boring for me.My favourite porn is japanese porn especially if the actors are those lean and cute types.(There a few bloggers that I know are my type :) ).


Where are you,my Adonis?




To think about it carefully,my love and sex life has gone downhill since I came from NS 3 yrs ago.I miss my time in spore,the guys there are so yummy and I had the freedom to go out as i wish unlike now cos of a strict dad.Or maybe I didn't offer any farewell prayers to the Guardian of the Lion city. Maybe,I'll call up my Spore mates,ask them to a few offerings to It on my behalf.


The Merlion
The Guardian of Singapore

I know I'm sound so desperate but I'm sure the readers would understand my plight of a gay man not getting any in either holes.

For my Friends and Bro

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

2 pour or not to pour


"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it"

by Evelyn Beatrice Hall


Many of the comments that I received for the last post was simply to pour tea on the lim peh's head and walk off.I really don't agree with the comments because of the quote above. I truly believe that each person has the right to voice his opinions and we as the listeners have the option of either accept his views or to disagree with his views.

True,I could just keep my mouth shut and walk away but I felt that I was obliged to change his mindset cos we are supposed to fight ignorance with wisdom.

Besides that,do we simply use violence to correct a person?By using violence,you are just forcing ur views on the person and this would make the person thinks that his views are correct and thus you fail in ur objectivity.

















Saturday, March 14, 2009

Stupid humans

DO WE HAVE THE RIGHT TO JUDGE A PERSON WHILE WE,OURSELVES ARE IMPERFECT.

ALL RACES ARE EQUAL.

A few days ago,I was with my Dad at the local mamak stall where his friends joined us for a cuppa. Being an apolitical person,I tried to steer out of politic talk,it was boringlah. I rather talk about the next fashion trend than politics. If you read the papers or watch the news,U'll agree with me that politics is a endless circle,that party bad mouths this party and vice verse. The only thing that I support is Voter's rights and Gay Rights.

Ok, what I wanted to highlight was during the "discussion",one of the lim pehs stated that the major problem in Msian politic was to allow the non-Malays to have a say in the issues,after all Malaysia is owned by Malays.

Now,I was shocked that a well- learn person could stated the above. He was also talking about the rights of Malays and etc etc.

Being a person that has brains in the head,I challenged him to give me reasons for his statements. The reasons were:

1) Without the non-Malays,the issue of religion is unquestionable cos all of the Malays are Muslim.

2) Without the non-Malays,the issue of race is negligible cos of all the citizens are Malays.

3) There will be no fuss about the economy

He went on and on by arguing his points.

Then I ask him that whether he a native of this land meaning that his ancestors didn't migrate from another place. He said that he is a Javanese so this means that he is not a native of the land and is considered as a migrate which is by a wide definition comprises all the non-Malays and Malays as they are from various places.

I also asked him on what basis did he thought that Malays are the overlords of the land? He cited the history of Melaka. I rebutted that Parameswara and the Orang laut were migrants from Palembang so they are not natives. He just kept quiet while I present my rebuttal:

1) The true natives are the orang asli and the other races in Sabah & Sarawak which are the Dayaks,Kadazans and so on. Malays are migrants.

2) Malays have a mixed pedigree,some married Chinese,Indians or Siamese. This
inter- marriage gave us the term PERANAKAN. So this strengthens my argument that they are not natives which have a pure pedigree.

3) The Orang Asli didn't make any noise about Malays being their overlords.So why are these ppl acting like they own the place.

4) Malaysia is 51 yrs old,We should be thinking that regardless of race and religion,we all salute the same and only flag which is JALUR GEMILANG.

This issue should be a thing of the past.It truly saddens me that this issue is brought up by a learnt man.

A pic of me?

Ok,I think most of u are dying to see my pic and wondering how I look,rite.

So here is my pic.



How do I look? Pretty rite?

Hahahaha,no lah.That's not me.She is my girlfriend from foundation and she was the 2nd person that I came out to.We spent a morning together today since I didn't go o Kl to meet my Ah ti and his bf. We laughed a lot and talk about the latest happenings.( I didn't meet her for 3 mths).

Guys,Do you want to see her others pics?



Now do you want to see my pic?





Am i cute?

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Wonderful life ?

Many ppl reckon that being gay is a great,no worries cos we have no burdens like wife or kids. Look around you,most gays can afford to throw their money on spas,treatments or even operations. And did you notice the cars that gays drive? They often drive those high end cars like Mercedes or BMWs. Also guess who spends a fortune on self-maintenance and clubbing,well its us.
We spend the most amount of money in any category.


I'm telling these breeders that gays are actually living a lonely life.Without a solid bond like Marriage,our partner could leave us anytime,without children,we are going to die alone. To those who came out and didn't have family support,they are even worst.Ppl that they know for a lifetime,suddenly isolated them,not wanting to even be in the same room with their devil possesed children.

So they ask why gays are so cheerful and have smiles on their faces when the reality that they face is so bleak.

The reason is simple,we gays are the most proud,thick-faced and determined humans that you could ever meet in this world.Why I'm stating this statement?

The answer is in us,we the gays,fags,fruits and etc etc. We are the living proof of that statement. I have not seen a gay being beaten by a woman in a verbal fight nor had seen a gay that is less than a straight man in any category. Some of us could even boast that our holes are the tightest,our fucks are the best and no woman can beat a gay at blowjob.

We or should I boldly say that We,the gay race accept anyone without being bias of colour,creed or religion.Don't believe me,go to the clubs and witness the power of gay unity. Maybe we shuldn't go that far,look at our blogospehere,we often support each other here thru their saddest moments and rejoice at their happiest moments.

So being gay is actually a great thing after all. Maybe if we had some fags in the UN,there would not be any war in this world.

ps: To Lesbian frens,I'm sorry that I didn't mention your kind in my posts. Just bear with me that when I talk about gay issues,you are also included.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

My personal space

In this post,I'm inviting you into my most personal area,my bedroom. Its quite personal cos so far only 5 ppl had entered in,even my exs didn't have the chance to see it.


This is the view from the doorway,I'm suppose to share it with my bro
but he prefers to sleep with my younger sis.




This is my bed,just a normal single bed.
Trying to upgrade it to queen size soon




My entertainment center,d PS is currently at the workshop.
U can see the gift that my Ah Ti bought for me.
I sleep while looking at it.



My wardrobe.
Its damm full of clothes



My bookshelf.
Like clothes,I have too much of books.
The other twin is in my sis's room,that one
is also full of books.



My exercise space. Suppose to exercise more right but
lately to busy with school
and maintaining my health.



And that the whole of my room,it still need to be work on but at least its colours match. Maybe shuld repaint the walls.Too romantic,don't you think?

Monday, March 9, 2009

An eulogy

As you all know that my one of my ex had passed away. Although I had talked about him briefly in my blog,I believed that a longer intro is needed to describe this great man.

His name is Han Zhi Long aka Daniel. He is in his late 30s. He was a mentor/a lover and the most important man in my gay life. Trough him,I learn more about gay life and accept my identity. He was the most patient guy that I know. He didn't get tired of my antics and needs. He always gave in a fight. His hugs were the warmest,his kisses were full of passion.

He was the pillar of support I had when I was away from my family. Once,I had to work during Raya,I was so sad cos I was unable to come back to celebrate Raya with my family. I was crying whenever I was alone cos everywhere I saw people buying stuff for their home and kids and the raya songs were on the radio.

On the Eve of Raya,I broke down literally,I was crying till my eyes were red and I also refuse to break fast. He was so sweet,he hugged me thru the nite and forced me to eat. He really didn't care of me being a muslim and he was a christian.

In the morning, I didn't have the strength to wake up when I smelt the scent of Redang,Ayam masak merah and Ketupat (tradisional malay food). I was curious so I went to the kitchen and to my suprise,he was cooking all the above. Seeing that I broke down in tears and he came and hugged me ( His hugs were plenty) till the redang was burnt.

Another thing that I liked was whenever I had a problem,I would be as silent as a post, he would often just hug me silently,he knew that when I'm ready to talk,I would talk.

The 8 mths that we're together was the best 8 mths ever.

If there is one thing I had regretted,it was ending the relationship we had. I couldn't be seen taking advantage of his love,I felt that I need to accomplish my goals before I could be worthy of him.

Oh God,You had truly taken an angel to ur side............

..........................

I just received a call from my ex's housemate(i think) whose was Pete who said that Han (my ex,the guy in the 4th part of my post) had died due to a car accident in D.C. I knew that Han wasn't going to D.C thru the emails he had sent but this stupid guy keeping saying that he wasn't lying.

So I called the mum up,luckily she didn't change her hp no. She was saying the same thing. I told her it wasn't funny and tell Han that don't play these kind of jokes. Han's mum cried and put the phone down. After a few mins,Han's bro called back and said that the news was true and ask me to accept it. All these while, I was at the phone in front of my sis and tears were running down my face.

Its so not fair,Han was thinking of coming to Kl next mth......


Sunday, March 8, 2009

Gay society

Helo,guys. Solved a major problem today,safe to say we're clear on the relationship that we're having and its limits and we're cool about it.

Ok,I'm going to introduce to you about the types of gays out there. I had learned to sort them according to their groups throughout the years.

They are:

1) Newbies ( adek2)

Those people who are new to the gay world.These are the people that just entered the gay scene,they are the most active on the dance floors,chatrooms and gay websites. They would shamlessly strut their bodies and their goods. They would rather have a lot of admirers and switch partners like changing their clothes. They often would wear body fitting clothes and tight pants. Some of them end up as money bois.


2) Abang2

These people would often be the seniors,veterans of the gay world. They are active in the gay scene.Most of them would play the role of advicers to Newbies. Their goal in life are to get a lifetime lover.They are mostly are successful ppl in their chosen fields. They are the prime prey of money bois cause of their wallets

3) Gaia

These are ppl are those mak nyahs that are still new and original ( no modifications done on their bodies).They would wear women clothes and try yo raise funds for their transformation. Often spotted at clubs or boutiques.

4) Mak nyah

These are those that had undergo changes(operations) and are qualified to be called women. They would generally be at boutiques or as a mc at gay events or sometimes at dark lorongs in Kl.

5) Divas

They are those gays that demand respect from the common folk and often be the star of any parties or events. They would be the mother figure of their own clans or families. They often required total devotion of their clan members cos they are the ones that gives protectin and counsel. Some divas would openly declare their emmity to other divas. Sometimes,they are super unpleasant but they have their functions in the gay society. Afterall, we do need Queens to rule us.

6) Common folk

They are the people who really don't care about class divisions in Gay society. These people would easily be friends with any class and still maintain their personality and diginity. They value friendship and focus on their careers or lovers. They don't follow fashion or trends as long as they are happy,they are fine.

Friday, March 6, 2009

How it all began part 4

Sori for the delays and all but so many things had happened to me lately.

The story continues........

The boy had to leave his family in the city of orchids to go back to the City of Lions,not by his choice but by force,due to NS.

In couple of months,he had to settle down and accustom himself with the ways of the lion people.It wasn't easy for him being alone in a big city.

Through the chat rooms,he found friends and lovers. The friends were a mixed group,some were devils in disguise and some were angels. All of them taught the boy how to be a better gay.In the 2 years,he grown wiser and less naive. His innocence was gone,he had only wits and dignity left.

In the 1st year,he found true love,a man who lives by himself and was patience enough to teach him of the ways to survive in the gay world. For 8 months,he had stayed with the man and slept the same bed.They were almost like a husband and wife,tending to their household.

Many a sweet memory,they had shared till the man had expressed his wishes to migrate to the City of Maple. The boy refused to follow due to he wants to be a better person,an equal to his lover.He was sick of the rumours that some of his companions spread around that he was just a freeloader,a moneyboi taking advantage of the man.

With tears in his eyes,he said goodbye and left the man to pursue his wishes. The boy was beginning to be man. He had learnt that God had always had a plan for him and he worked hard to pursue his dreams.

Until he had finished his NS,there were many more affairs that he had entered but most were brief.The man that he left was the King of his heart,he could never forget that man who had treated him with love and tender care. Until a day,that he got a message that the man had asked him to move on and live life to the fullest and forgive him of his selfishness. The boy had realised that true love was an illusion,the best that he could have is a love which pure and meaningful.

When he came back from the City of Lions,he saw that the gay scene in his hometown was vicious and he was alone.

Slowly,he gained friends,some were temporary and some were trustworthy. He was determined to be the best that he can and try to find that special someone to love till the end of time.

Could that boy succeed in his quest for pure love,this blog would be the statement of that ending......

Thursday, March 5, 2009

me,myself and I

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education

You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

How it all began Part 3

Guys,I'm writing this down,not to ask for sympatpy but as a warning to those newbies,the gay world is a vicious one,without the rite guide,u will get lost.

The story continues ........

In form 4,the boy was lost cos many of his friends went to boarding skools, he fell into the depths of depression.His hopes of recovery lies in his family's support but each time,he wants to share his problems,the family had greater problems so he suffered slowly and in silence.

After mid-year,some of his friends came back and he is happy again,You see,this boy had a problem,he is shy to make new bonds and when he makes a new bond,he'll never let go. So with help of his friends,he recovered but in the shadow,he still has to deal with his inner demons which is Lonely and Jealousy.

At the same time,he met a prefect who was the ideal student,hardworking and diligent. This prefect shared his problems especially of why he came back and they became close.This boy was evil in his intentions,he just wanted to have sexs with the prefect and he did on an afternoon under the pretext of study group. Its was an one time affair,both regretted doing it.But this confirmed one thing about him,he belonged to the rainbow clan.

In form 5,girls came into the picture,he was playing around to cover his true nature. Some girls got hurt by him and some didn't care.

After graduation,he went school forever,never to return even for reunions. During the wait of getting the SPM results,he had a lover who is older and wiser than him,for once he had a even match. He spent afternoons calling the lover,his telephone bills were around RM 150- Rm 200 a month. He was blindly in love,whatever the lover wanted like for an example a reload,he would get it for him. For the boy,it doesn't matter how he got the extra money,his wish was to make his lover happy but the lover was an evil monster,he dumped the boy after he was done with him. The boy had to endure his 1st love ache alone.No one came to the boy's rescue.He got a help in form of a song,a song that was sand by a saint who was blessed by Gays all around whose voice echoes the motto of Gays all around.He decided that he will indeed survive.

Then the National Service letter came and he had to report to Jln Bahar Camp which was under the Singapore Civil Defence Force............

ps: part 1 and part 2 are here.

Monday, March 2, 2009

To hug or kiss

Yesterday,Little prince was asking whether I like hugs or kisses.

In my mind,This was the picture i had:

1)HUG


When the both of you share a hug,ur heartbeats become one. In a brief moment,you become one,the smell of his perfume engulfs u and his warmth keeps the cold away.Ur heart beats slowing,trying to match with his heart's rhythm. Hands of the embracing couple seems to emerge into one and the ownership of the hands seems to be blur.

2) KISS



Ur looking into his eyes deeply. In a single moment,u see an invitation in his eyes urging u to continue ur move. Slowly,u plant kisses on his lips. His grip tightened and his eyes close,surrendering his body to you. In his moment of vulnerability,you bring him closer and ur tongue invades his mouth driving him to ecstasy. He begins to match ur movements and ur bodies melt into one.


So what was my choice? I'm a bit greedy so I chose both options. Why? A kiss is as symbol of passion and for me its like an appetizer while a hug is more meaningful and its a main course. (hard to describe this)



Sunday, March 1, 2009