Empty

Spend an hour staring at the lappie,gathering my thoughts on what to write..many events had happened but somehow I lost the idea of what to write when I start to type,it seems that most are meaningless and mundane things,things that keep repeating itself no matter how I try to avoid it,BRAIN always loses to HEART in all circumstances.

Someone once told me that he admires the way that I live my life,making FUCK THEM ALL my motto but how am I to tell him that living this life needs a lot of courage which I don't always have,preferring to sleep/run from important decisions or just waiting for things to pass. I'm not strong always and not weak most of time,my blog and wall are some of the places that I vomit my thoughts out,not thinking of what others might think of, portraying myself as an idiot and hoping that a few would notice the honesty in my voice.

"I speak yet no one hears" is indeed a terrible syndrome to have,yet I continue to scream till my voice is hoarse,share ur troubles he says and yet he keeps things private for himself..

I donnoe if I can keep shouting,every Superman need his Louis Lane.. of all the dumb things that I have done,one is in the top of list,making a declaration is easy but facing the aftermath of it is hard. Times like this,I wish I have a time machine or a built in dumb alert so that each time I say stupid things,I could go back/stop myself from making the mistake,maybe I'm mentally challenged ....

How I wish we could go back and spend time talking about random stuff over a cuppa,again i have to remind myself that ppl can't spare their time for an insignificant me and come running when I call upon them..

So yet again,I managed to drown myself in words,in a post that will bring no benefit to no one and be silenced by the din of cyberspace.

"If an idiot is a person who is honest of his feelings,I don't mind being the biggest idiot there is"

Uzumaki Naruto