Bye2 Blackbird

As I had said earlier,I would blog about someone in my past who had changed me from being a self centered jerk to a caring bastard,unfortunately,I can never say how grateful I am to him for the change.

I was in Spore serving my Ns when I met with this guy,his name is Darren. He is a Jc student whose parents were rather influential and are socialites. Unlike his parents,he hates to socialize and often kept to himself and his best fren is the com. He could online 24 hrs a day,7 times a week. His frens would often have to force him to go out,often we would go to his place and wait for him to get dress and all cos if we didn't do that,he would never leave house except for sch.

U may think that he is a fatty asshole but thanks to his genes,he is pretty cute and lean. The other weird thing about him is he never gets high grades in his exams but if ask to explain a science fact or complicated algebra equation, he could really explain till the ah soo next door could understand it.

So he has the IQ,cash and looks but he is a super loner... U could say that he is living in his own world..

At that time,I was a newbie,in love with my 1st ex and had hard time lowering my walls for others and was super jealous of this guy cos my ex is his closest confidant. My ex would rush to his aid no matter how busy he was.

When I asked why he does that,my ex would say that Darren is actually suffering from depression,often than not,he would have thoughts of ending his life. The cause of his depression was due to his parents unrealistic dreams for him and he couldn't come to terms that he is gay.

Anyway, I couldn't care less about the guy.( meanie) I mean who cares what the world think of them,U have one life and u sure as hell don't owe it to others.. Live ur life.. Beggars and wimps shuld just die off. (Remember I was 19-20 yrs old when I said this).

A few months later,Darren found a lover and after a few weeks,the lover dumped him. I guess for Darren,tis was the last straw and the next day,he overdosed himself.

Personally,I felt bad cos I didn't really took the time to know him and a lot of frens also felt the same way.. We were his fairweather frens.. If we had really shown him that we cared aout him,things might have ended differently.. he would realised that as long as there's a hand to support him,life isn't as bleak as he had pictured.

U could say that my overnagginess attitude is some sort of personal redemption for the way that I had treated Darren.