Thursday, April 16, 2009

Omg,ur gay

"Omg,Ichi,ur gay? but we used to talk about girls in class. We used to compared who had the nicest cut."

" Hahaha,I knew it.Ur too much of a gentleman."

" Are u serious.We had been friends for 8 yrs. Now u tell me,btw I'm gay too."

" Gay is a sin"

The quotes were examples of ppls' reaction when I told them that I am gay.Yes,I'm out of the closet finally but since I'm a wimp,I told my dirty little secret to my frens and uni mates only,I need to grow bigger balls if I'm going to tell it to my family.

What drove me to shout it to the world?

Well,there were 3 reasons:

1) There was this bitch that told ppl that I'm into her.She even called her bf to chat with me. In the end,I had no choice to tell her that I like Joes not Janes. She termalu sendiri when I told the world.

2) I was bored of lying to my frens,they were all asking whether if I like that girl or this girl.

3) I felt trapped,insecure and afraid that my dirty little secret might be uncovered by someone sneaky and they might use it against me.

So in my final sem of foundation,I told my grupmates,my ex classmates and I change my details in frenster and myspace,joined G4M and Trevvy.

The line that I used was "Hi,can we chat privately for a while? I just want to tell u that I'm gay.There's nothing different with me,I'm still the Ichi that u had known yesterday.Just that I'm into guys."

After the shock had subsided,most of them except pt one said a version of those quotes above.The one fren who was silent just walked away and never to be from heard again. I guess he wasn't good enuff for the true Ichi.Those who had stayed had million and one questions and all of them started with Why,When,Where,What and How. Most of the girlfrens became my Faghags,some even tried to bring me on a blind date with their girl frens,just to confirm or tried to get me horny.All asked me for dating tips and bed tips,some trust me enuff to help them dress and shooed their bfs out during the process.

What did I get from coming out? Well,I got to know my true friends,got a rumour in uni that I'm a bf-stealer and strangely,I felt peace with myself.Its like I lost a heavy burden that I had been carrying around for years,I had truly felt that I had embraced the real me.My BGFs and I share all of the the details of our hook ups from the size of his pecker to his performance in bed.Sometimes,we just go to the mall and do boy-watching,feasting on our eyes on the various types of boycandy.

Now u may ask why I didn't tell my family about my dirty little secret? Well,my parents are the Conservative type and they might throw me out if they know,actually that is a lame excuse that I use.The real reason is I want to be prepared in all aspects before I tell them,I want to show them that even gays could achieve goals and I don't want to burst their hopes of having a daughter in law or grand kids or a man in the family.

As a moral of the story,u have to come out of the closet,sooner or later and its best that u come out on ur own terms and the air outside of the closet is damn fresh and sweet.

9 comments:

Pranny said...

Hey Gor....zzz I haven read ur post.. Before I read is like.. Look at mine and ur title.. :(

Are u gay... Next thing I say yes then u replied..

OMG ur gay !! LOL

Armanique said...

well... i out myself to my closest bunch of friends. Initially quite shocked bt well there were positive abt it. Wat matters are frenship and i agree with u that lying to friends isnt the way.

i too have conservative parents so it will be neh for me too haaha

savante said...

Your true friends will understand hopefully :) And those who don't, well they never really knew you anyway.

ichimaru akira said...

Little prince: I know,I got the idea from reading urs.

Armanique: Yeah,the feeling is mutual.

Savante: thanks.I rather have 1 good fren than a thousand lousy ones.

.:: Ant ::. said...

Well said Ichi! please go share your thoughts with Jerry :)

+Ant+

the viennamese said...

Whomever who told you that being gay is a sin should get bent. Isn't existing in the world a sin to begin with, and they preach that everything we do under their god's eye is a sin. So if they want to put it that way, being straight is a sin too!

Glad that most of your friends accept you for who you are inside.. and for those who can't, they're just too weak to handle the truth. You don't want them in the future chapters of your life anyway.

Congrats on your coming out! :)

ichimaru akira said...

Anton:I did.

Evann:I totally agree with u.Cheers nate

Kenji said...

Ohhh gawd! You're gay! EWWW!

Haha joking, but yes, I respect your decision and I respect you even more!! I wouldn't dare to come out to most of my friends but then again, even if i did, it think it's pointless! xD

But I do owe it to let my family know, but until i'm sure my youngest brother is straight, i'm not about to break the news to my parent, "Hey mom, dad? Guess what? All 3 of your sons are gay!" >_>

ichimaru akira said...

Kenji: Are u serious? my gawd.